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No one teaches us how to fill our own ache, so we spend a lifetime attempting to fill it with people, places and things that don’t serve us. There are countless blog pieces, magazine articles and books out there attempting to hip you to the way to “win” at the dating and relationship “game.” Here’s the problem: People who play games, and who see connection and relationships as games, never really grow up. Women are not living, breathing entities with their own ideas about who they are; they are simply objects to be used or won, whose value is determined by their cunning or hapless use of their “cookie.” The book reduces us down to what Harvey believes are our least common denominators: men’s need for money, sex and a place to be king of the castle, and women’s need to stave off the social stigma of loneliness, the overall poor opinions of others, and the struggle of raising children on their own. The barely-hidden cruelty of it is like watching a cat toy with a mouse.It plays upon the worst insecurities of men and women – but especially the African-American women who make up a large portion of its target audience: “We’re (men) pretty confident that your willingness to be in a relationship with us supersedes all the things we do that look suspicious, because we know you’ll work through the suspicion – that it’s more important to you to be with us in our imperfection than to leave us and be alone.” And there, loud and clear, is the two-fold message that African-American men are not capable of a deep, abiding, faithful soul connection and African-American women are so afraid of being alone they’ll accept that and the destructive behavior that goes with it. Sorry, Steve, but we do not exist on this earth to settle for scraps from one another.You can meet potential dates at a singles event or singles activity.Meet single volunteers, meet dates at charity fundraiser, singles wine tasting, dining club or dance.It was a great night, filled with stimulating conversation, laughter and, in the end, high-quality intimacy. Because I have the emotional muscle and maturity to understand that our backgrounds, entanglements and existing commitments preclude us from that kind of a connection.Is it my intention to exclusively date or eventually try to marry this guy? In other words, I don’t want to marry every man that I date.
We have arranged with the venue to provide 3 hour valet parking to anybody at our event who purchases two drinks or other items from the bar or restaurant (subject to availability).
But a blog with a newsgathering mission has other issues to consider, especially one reporting on commercial development.
The default position for many bloggers is anonymity and most readers respect a desire for privacy.
I’m currently reading a galley copy of “Men on Strike” by Dr. A thought-provoking book that I’ll write about more after I’m done reading it.
Basically, it talks about why men are boycotting marriage and fatherhood.
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When it comes to dating, single women and men are told the rules are out the window, which leaves many of us wandering around waiting for our soul mates to drop out of the sky. this takes the form of someone forwarding you an email about a happy hour with no additional commentary.